Becoming Learn-ed

We learn just too many things in life but how many do we apply day in and out, rarely a few. No wonder people of the earlier generations gave so much emphasis on the womenfolk learning to cook well because that's something you can't survive without. I learnt how to make masks and chains with the orangies (I call them so, otherwise they are called 'BuckyBalls' and HE laughs when i used the word 'orangies').

In multi-national organizations, some weightage (Performance Appraisal) is also given to the kind of trainings you attend and deliver. A few months ago I attended one delivered by two people, one of the trainers was a Gold medalist from ISI. I tried hard to understand what he was planning to deliver and looked at the other trainees, most of who were sipping cups and cups of coffee to keep themselves awake during the session. The other trainer scored her 8.5 out of a 10 and the brilliant Gold medalist had a tough luck with keeping people happy and scored a bare 1.5.

There are the best and worst forms of things you experience in life. For example, people say 'he is the most wonderful person i have met till date' and the sentence holds true till they don't meet a more wonderful person. As we are talking about trainings here, I will state one as was narrated to me by one of the friends. There were two trainers again and a bunch of 20 trainees. The theoretical part was very well explained by the first trainer and when everyone was looking forward to some interesting exercises and case studies by the second trainer, the expectations went for a toss, passing seconds seemed like days and mobiles became the loveliest things and one of the trainees just became an observer. A third eye view of what happened across the room.

A graph was shown which apparently had 3 lines running from left to right. One of the lines was black in colour.
Trainee: What does the black line represent?
Trainer: It is the ROP line
Trainee: That's okay, but what does it represent?
Trainer: It is the ROP which is dependent on the AOP
Trainee: That's okay but I want to know as to what does it represent?
Trainer: It is the ROP line showing averages for the last 12 months
Trainee: I want to know as to what does the line signify, why is it drawn here and how does one interpret the line or read it
Trainer: It is the black dotted line that has been cut and pasted from the graph I showed in my last slide
Trainee: Thanks!
and the trainee went into peaceful sleep for the next part of the session.

Another one was trying hard to get the head and tail out of the session and was beating the floor so hard that the carpet seemed to be coming out. One turned his face into that of an ill-looking donkey who was not fed for days. One looked at the trainer as if that was the last time he was looking at her. A few ordinary ones opened up the games on their phones and started playing. A desperate few tried hard to make out what was told until someone shouted 'Stop it!' and things came to a standstill.

Story-time

There was a cuckoo which used to sing really well and was quite popular in the forest for its skills. Once it found a piece of bread from the leftovers by the villagers. It was very happy and kept the small quantity in its nest. A fox saw this and made up a plan. The fox said ‘You sing so well, i have never been able to listen to your songs. Could you please sing one line for me’. The cuckoo was very happy and said ‘why not’ and sang a few lines for the fox. The fox tapped and smiled and clapped with its feet and danced. The fox then suggested ‘It would be an improvisation of your skills if you hold something in your mouth and try singing’. The cuckoo took this as an opportunity to learn and develop and held the bread in its mouth. As soon as it popped open its mouth for singing, the bread fell and the fox picked it up and ran away.

In a village lived a wise man who was very fond of his friend. They both travelled countries and celebrated festivals together along with their families. The wise man’s friend did not have a child and that was something that he was always upset about. When the wise man found a new job in a far off city, he asked the friend to take care of his son till he came back. The friend immediately agreed. As the little boy started growing up, the wise-man’s friend never told him about his father. When the wise man returned after a few years, the friend enquired as to who he was and after all the pleading and crying the friend refused to recognize him. He was wise to the whole world but could not be wise to himself.

Moral of the stories: The world is built on trust but trust those who are trust-worthy!

Definition

As one of my cousins puts it, “I m more than charmed, captivated, moved, touched, cooked, hooked, booked, elated, delighted, fancied, proposed, … … been loved and loving on top of my toes and heels” and I think He doesn’t believe in most of these ‘-ed’ words, so this cannot be the definition. I have not been able to give it the ‘Right’ definition as yet, but I may be able to tomorrow, may be a few years down the line, may be in a decade, may be before I die, may be never.

Do you always need a definition to put things into perspective?

If you want to have a coherent discussion, where everyone’s on the same page… Yes!

Where marriages are irreversible

"That was a painstaking task. You are an ideal example of what a woman is today and will be in the years to come. Thanks for spending your valuable time with us. I m sure our audience have liked you very much and I wish all the great success to you and your family", the journalist complimented and ended the talk show. Ruhina recalled the days when she was in college and how glamorous life looked back then - Easy, accomplish-able, good-sweet-magical, happening, etc. She used to drive the old Fiat at 90-100 Km/Hr on the National highway, played music which people at a Km's distance could listen to, talking obnoxiously and taking more number of friends in the car than it could accommodate.

They had been to this trip in Dehradun where she thought she met the man that she was looking for in life. Everything seemed right at that point of time and they were tied into the wed-lock as soon as she graduated. With a degree in Sociology from LSR, she had never thought of dis-continuing her education. Things changed all of a sudden and she was unable to pursue her dreams. Apparently, he was not the man he had pretended to be and life lost all the charm within a few days. She had fought hard with her parents and family convincing them that he was the right man for her. This man called up his friends every evening and they drank and enjoyed while she wept in a corner of the room. He used to wake up every morning and beg her for what he did last night. But the evenings never changed and living life under the same roof became difficult. She did not file for separation nor did she raise her voice, instead she left him and found herself a job in Delhi. Facing society in a typical Upper-middle class environment was not so easy and with a child in her arms, the first few years of her work life were as difficult as trying to clap with a single hand.

Life moved on, nothing extra-ordinary happened in her life. She brought up her child, got her married, retired with a pension and created her own circle with whom she can talk and interact till one day when she saved a Politician's daughter from an accident and she came into limelight. That's when the journalists did a background check and called her up for an interview. Else she would have died unknown as the wife of the man who never tried figuring out where she had gone. She got a few assignments from the Television industry post the interview and the old man came running and said 'You know how much I searched for you. Where were you?' to which she said 'I can never forget you, you know why. You remind me of my lifetime of a mistake'.

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I hear loud noises coming from the balcony. I come out to see what is happening. The good old Physics teacher is again scolding one of his sons. 'How dare you say such a thing. I will throw you out of the house' the teacher said. 'Its not me who is telling. The whole school knows about her. Why don't you leave my mom and let us go out of this house', the son replies. 'You are not entering this house from now. Go wherever you want but don't show me your face ever again'.

The teacher's wife continued staying with him for the sake of society, for the sake of her children, for the sake that she was not financially independent, for the sake that she did not want her mother to die an early death, for the sake that she could not believe in second marriage, for the sake that 'it only happens once', etc.

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In the Indian context, marriages (Arrange or paired doesn't matter) are an irreversible reaction. Once into one, you can't think of another unless you are a B or a C Khan. You love it or hate it, there is no second to it, that's just it.

Separation and mutual split-up still happen but people are afraid to walk to the Judiciary. Primary reason being its expensive nature and secondary being the social habitat that doesn't permit one to come out from the same even if one wishes to.

'Happiness: are you kidding me. That's the last in the list'.